schneefink

Every once in a while I read posts/accounts/experiences of people with ADHD online and think "hey, that all sounds very familiar;" to the point where I have looked up ADHD symptoms multiple times only to realize that I almost certainly don't have it, there's just a huge overlap between symptoms of ADHD, depression, and anxiety. "Shame," my stupid brain thought, "because if I did have it, I could get magic drugs to make my brain work better." (I know it doesn't work like that.) Only to remember that I do take magic drugs to make my brain work better, they're called antidepressants. …but I would like better magic drugs, that make all my brain problems go away. Hmpf. (I did talk to my psychiatrist not too long ago and my drug dose is fine/good enough that I really don't want to experiment rn.) Instead I get advice like "get enough sleep, liquids, iron, vitamins, and exercise," aka the slow way. I'm working on it, but magic would be so much more convenient.

So that got me thinking on the topic of healing spells for mental illnesses in fantasy settings. D&D has spells like "Heal" and "Greater Restoration" that removes "eliminates fatigue and exhaustion, and removes all forms of insanity, confusion, and similar mental effects." I'm pretty sure those were meant to be insanity and confusion that were created by magical effects in the first place, but would they also work on other forms? What about trauma etc.? (I bet there are quite a few powerful and/or rich people and workaholics who would try to abuse Greater Restoration to sleep less and work more, but maybe long-term that might have negative effects.) And if you only have magical spells against physical illnesses, would mental illnesses be taken more seriously or be even more stigmatized? Hm.
(If anyone knows of a canon that covers that topic I'd be interested in recs.)

Yesterday I finally got a vaccination appointment in three weeks, via my workplace. I was very glad to finally have a concrete date: previously I had heard that I should be able to get an appointment in June but it seemed dubious.
And then this afternoon my doctor called me to say that she had doses left over and since I had registered on her waiting list I could get one if I showed up in the next three hours, so I got my first dose! A big surprise and such a relief.

When I got home we had delicious Indian food (we tried all of DD's Indian recipes this week and decided we need to cook Indian more often), then I had class and my presentation went ok, and then I realized that the Critical Role rebroadcast of yesterday's episode was running. (I wasn't even aware they did rebroadcasts before Mondays.)

I haven't regularly watched CR in a while, but I do regularly read episode summaries and reactions, and sometimes I watch episodes (or parts of them) when they sound particularly good.

( Quick notes from a while ago about episodes 124 & 125 )

I also watched episode 139 last week, mostly because punishandenslavesuckers (who wrote one of my favorite CR fics, Carry It Until We Die) posted a dark AU to the episode, and I enjoyed it.

And then today I watched most of episode 140 (I missed the first hour or so because of class) and I had a great time. There was lots of flailing at the screen and many high-pitched noises.

( episode 140 spoilers )

So much fun, many emotions, and I look forward to the ending.

I got to ride in an ambulance today for the first time! ...because DD dislocated her shoulder -.- Right after her ankle recovered, too. At least it was when I was at home and could help. Not that I could do that much, but still. At least now I can make sure she doesn't need to move her arm before the doctor says she can. (This is why I really wouldn't want to live alone.)

The ambulance team was very nice, but, and this is the main thing DD remembers because she was so out of it with shock, one of them had terrible Star Wars opinions. I get soo annoyed by people - especially guys - telling me that the worst thing that's wrong with the sequel trilogy is that Rey was able to hold her own in a fight against Kylo Ren in TFA. Unlikely/unrealistic is one thing, but more unrealistic than anything else happening in any of the previous Star Wars movies? Seriously?? (Personally, the thing that annoys me the most about the sequel trilogy is that ( Spoiler for TRoS )

Anyway, it worked as a distraction. DD's shoulder got put back into place quickly; they forgot to prescribe her painkillers, but fortunately we still had some at home. There was some slight confusion about her insurance (she has private health insurance and is so used to using it that she forgot which public one she's technically insured with, which you afaik only need to know at hospitals), but never any worry. We're so lucky with our national health service. I especially like the new health hotline, I might hesitate to call the ambulance when something doesn't look like an emergency-emergency but that hotline is very convenient. Though it would be best if I don't have to call again for a while.

It's March and we had ~15°C today, so my flatmate shut off the heating (because of the noise) and it's cold in my room, but I don't want to turn it on again because it's not that cold and I'm still somewhat afraid of finding out in a few months what the heating costs for this flat are. Bäh. I should at least put on a sweater or something.

Also because when I'm cold I don't sit relaxed, and that's even worse than I previously thought. I've had tendonitis problems for years; nothing helped for long and since it was only ever a few days every month or two so I got used to it. I did regular wrist exercises but they didn't seem to help much either. But a few months ago I realized that it always got much worse before exams, when I'm generally tense, so I started doing regular shoulder stretches, just a few minutes every evening, and ever since it's been a lot better. It's been a few months now and I've had barely any wrist problems :) I'm still being careful, of course, no use getting overconfident, but I think I've identified a big part of the problem. Progress.

Now stop procrastinating on studying self

( Health stuff )

I'll get a job offer in the next few days: the company where I worked last year wants me back for a few months because they need more people for a new project. It'd be part-time and I could easily schedule it around my classes, and it's not particularly stressful work so that's good too. The only thing that makes me hesitate is that they're likely (I'll only get their actual offer probably on Monday) offering less money than I want and think I'm worth, so I'll have to decide if I take the job regardless. Con: less money than I would likely get elsewhere, a job where I don't learn anything new. Pro: I could start immediately instead of however long it takes me to find another job, job applications suck, it's a good test of how many hours I can easily work while taking classes, and I always do better when I have an external structure. So I'll probably take the job anyway, fingers crossed the money will be ok. (It'll be fine for what I need in any case, but nothing extra.)

This weekend there's a family reunion on my father's side of the family, which I have little contact with. I'm a bit apprehensive because I don't know who exactly will be there, but almost certainly my aunt H, who I used to like a lot and see semi-regularly until we had a weird fight over three years ago and we haven't spoken since, and I don't know what if anything she told the rest of the family. But it's just for two nights and the worst thing that can realistically happen is that it's awkward the whole time, and I can deal with that. And the food will be excellent.

Yesterday I went to the zoo again, because why not? I saw the seals being fed and the big male one jumping from a cliff multiple times, I had a fantastic view from the underwater window to see a polar bear dive and play with a truck tire (soo beautiful, and strong), I saw emus preening their feathers, and a presenting peacock running away from his albino rival.

( Health, eating, food )

4:30am and I almost finished packing! My time management is... not ideal. Now a few hours sleep, then a few things still to do, then to the airport. This will be the first time that I don't participate in an election, I ran out of time, I'm a bit disappointed in myself. (It's "only" the election of the mostly symbolic president, I definitely would have made time if we had a parliament or mayor election.)

Today in the morning I woke up to an excited text message from DD about the result of the first Pens playoffs game. Great win, now 15 more \o/ Playoffs are stressful.

I visited a Star Wars exhibition with DD in the afternoon, it was a lot of fun. Some original costumes, models, concept art, and some interactive "build your own character" stuff. Clearly made for fans. (She created a Twi'lek Jedi from Kashyyyk, I a Nautolan trader from Kamino, and yes of course I already thought of stories, that's what one does with characters.)

I'm not taking my laptop to NYC and I don't know how much internet access I'll have, I'm curious what and how much I'll miss. I'm very grateful for my ebook-reader, I made sure I'll have more than enough to read on the flight (especially considering that I'll definitely sleep for a few hours.)

ETA: Turns out I have iron-deficiency anemia, that explains several symptoms I didn't realize were symptoms. That's good news because it means I have another way to combat them. If I could pick, hopefully my appetite will come back first.

I'm sick. I'm literally shivering and my teeth are chattering, and my throat hurts whenever I move my head. And I have an exam on Monday that I've barely studied for, great.
This is the second time I've been sick this January and the fourth time in the past five months, and I hate it. Not the best beginning for the new year.

In happier health-related news, my psychiatrist has me trying new antidepressants. Four days after I started taking them I could suddenly go a whole day without becoming exhausted and/or taking a nap. (Before I got sick, at least.) I'd forgotten that was possible! It feels great.